#10

The most attractive human feature? Kindness.

Why? Maybe because kindness is basically gentle acceptance, allowance things to be, mixed with empathy. And tell me who is not craving for being accepted?

Being next to a kind person is like being hugged, or sitting in the extremely comfortable chair. More, of course, of course much more.

Safety? Is being kind means being safe for others? Not aggressive? The one that is not going to hurt?

For me kindness is wideness. Is being able to accept the differences of the world, its inperfections, sharp edges, diversity – and basically find no conflict  in it. Holding all these inside you – and just letting it be.

Something curious happend to me today.

I dropped a can with the coffee grounds today, in the end of the workday. More than 10 pounds of the used grounds on the floor. Additional work to clean it, clean the floor. One of the guys who saw it said something like “Now you can scream”. Like, now you are allowed to be angry. And what is funny – I had no intention to get angry at all. I experienced basically no bad feelings. I didn’t see the thing to get angry at. Saw no reason. Yes, that happened, yes, I have to spend some time cleaning – but anger is definitely not the reaction that I had.

One friend of mine told me an interesting fact today. That women tend to be underpaid cause they don’t negotiate the salary. And they don’t negotiate the salary cause they don’t know if they are allowed to. Funny thing. And when they know that it is negotiable – they are as good at it as any man.

I am very sensitive to pressure, and I don’t like to be manipulated. And recently I am experiencing the manipulation all the time. Nothing new, all my life it comes with me loving my job – people are taking advantage of it. When I allow it. But it is like playing with the fire. One day I get tired to be nice, masks are falling down, and the show becomes much more interesting.